This is essentially what I've learnt from listening to the Joe Rogan Podcast:
Well this and do some fucking squats and eat a fucking steak.
Bear's a fucking killing machines that are really good at Jiu Jitsu. Don't go up and try and befriend a damn Bear, to them you look like just a sack of walking meat. They can't understand you, you standing there dangling a small piece of meat won't stop it from just thinking, "Why would I want the small piece when I can have this big dumb piece right here." And then they will fucking maul you.
Anyway, LET'S WATCH A BEAR FIGHT!!!!
Bear Fight Breakdown:
Alright so the one on the right we'll call Jimmy and he's rolling up to old Franky here. Seems to be a dispute about the territory or at least something about food, one of the two, has to be. So Jimmy is talking all this mad shit and Franky isn't having any of that shit today.
They lock up in a front clench. Franky works the under hooks in his front clench well and rotates Jimmy around but loses his grip and gives up control to Jimmy who uses his over clench on Franky's neck to steady himself back to a stable base. Now back to a stable base for both combatants and they eye each other down. Jimmy know realises he is still the smaller bear in the fight but let's out a defiant roar.
I really really hope it was some kind of Bear profanity, that would just make my day to know that a Bear basically yelled something along the lines of "Fuck You!" during a break in a fight
Both Bear's trundle around feeling each other out at arm's length range, testing whether either can get the upperhand in a strike exchange. Neither seem adept at striking at range when on two feet so Franky shoots in for another front clench. Underhooking the left side of Jimmy and driving low to execute a hip toss to gain a takedown and top position on the ground.
Franky works around to his left as he tries to pass Jimmy's guard. Jimmy though is moving his hips well and maintaining guard. Franky though stops and drives through on the right side and claims side control. Franky has Jimmy in a very vulnerable position as this can often seal victory in a Bear Fight. Claiming Side position and biting the neck of your grounded pinned opponent. School-yard Vampire Wrestling Rules.
But Jimmy is smart and keeps his face close to Franky's and pushes his head against this face so he can't get a clean bite onto his neck and manages to hook his arms onto Franky's body and rotates his body back into front guard position. The Bear reclaims Guard. He does this on instinct, just natural Bear Jiu Jitsu. It's like watching a giant poke'mon grappling fight. Now that's pretty much the climax of the fight as Franky urgently goes for the neck but Jimmy has his feet on Frank's hips and Franky can't get a clean hold of Jimmy's neck because Jimmy keeps pressing his face against Franky's. Jimmy fights off the bite attempt and works his way back to his feet. Franky gives up the clench and both Bear's go back to their all-fours.
Both exhausted from the fight neither continue to engage the other Bear and walk away in separate directions as both leave the battlefield. The Judge's score this round to Franky as he scored the only takedown of the fight and maintained a dominant position through out the fight.
================================================
Brought to you in part from listening to the .Joe Rogan Experience.
"Train by Day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, ALL DAY!" Yeah it doesn't make any damn sense but that's what's so awesome about the quote.
Nick Diaz just finished having a war of a damn fight where he had his face punched in a couple of times and you expect him to speak perfect English, yeah sure whatever.
.png)
.png)
.png)
.png)
.png)
.png)
.png)
.png)
.png)
.png)
.png)
.png)
.png)
