God Damn Ryan Gosling

Ryan Gosling is an absurdly attractive man, ask any woman who their current celebrity crush is at the moment at least 70% would say Ryan Gosling. The other 30% would be comprized of Athletes and then Maybe Bradley Cooper, then maybe George Cloney or Joseph Gordon Levitt. But why would you ask a women that question anyway? They don't know what they want, But the internet sure does and the internet freaking loves Ryan.

Also while we're on the topic of attractive men I never saw what was the big deal about Johnny Depp was anyway, he's very talented and a great father but he Looks like a Meerkat to me.

Seriously am I the only one that sees the resemblance?

While I will begrudgingly admit that Gosling is indeed a talented Canadian Actor. (I make note that he's Canadian because usually more Canadian actors work in Comedy) He's celebrity status has gained him his own internet meme. The 'Fuck Yeah! Ryan Gsoling' tumblr blog started the "Hey Girl" meme in January of 2008. Before this recent Gosling love parade. The Hey Girl meme basically gets pictures of Ryan Gosling with the phrase Hey Girl printed on it accompanied with a sweet message you'd expect him to seductively say to a woman. It's a dumb meme but it's insanely popular.









Anyway I'm not here to go on about the Hey Girl meme, I'm here to complain about the fact that he continues to come up with ways to make people love him further. Being Handsome and Talented isn't enough for this greedy son of a bitch. Just last year he went around New York stopping a fight between a Street Vendor and a customer. The Description for the Video is easily the best thing about the video though.

Two dudes are fighting in the middle of the street in NYC. (Typical.) They're playing tug-o-war over a painting (less typical) and while a girl is filming this ridic fight, literally OUT OF NOWHERE Ryan Gosling walks in (REALLY REALLY not typical). He steps into the quarrel and when he spots this altercation, he immediately tries to break it up (HEART OF GOLD!). Ryan drops his shopping bag (NOT MATERIALISTIC!) and throws his GIANT, THROBBING man muscle of an arm against the perpetrator and when he spots Ry Ry's huge guns, he throws his hands up in defeat. By some crazy stroke of luck, Ryan decided to wear a striped and nautical-inspired tank the VERY day his bulging biceps would come in handy. THEREFORE, his tank top basically saved the day. Would the story have played out differently if he was wearing a baggy hoodie? YES. You can't see all that rock hard steel beneath layers of cotton, people. Pure brawn speaks louder than any words you could POSSIBLY say to these angry gentleman, and for THAT, we should all give a nice, HUGE round of applause to Ryan Gosling's tank top. It saved the day AND gave us a nice show of what those bad boys can do.

Now that description is hilarious but Not only is he running around breaking up street fights, he's saving Women from the Traffic. Laurie Penny an English Writer tweeted last week about how Ryan had saved her from being run over in Downtown New York.

Now I've got that song "Real Hero" from the Drive soundtrack in my head. It seems oddly appropriate to bring that up and to post that here too.



Does anyone else remember that he was in Remember the Titans? Yeah me neither...



On a closing note I've think I've cracked the secret behind Ryan Gosling's appeal. The Power Lift! Women go crazy for a man with big burly arms that they can just jump onto and suck face. It's a Power More for Power Players and it seems to work. Heck the cover poster for The Notebook is him Powerlifting Rachal McAdams into another soft yet tight embrace.



God Damn Ryan Gosling... How the hell are normal guys supposed to compete with this guy? He can even power lift grown men! Here's him lifting Today Show Weatherman Al Roker.



I'm gonna go now and lift some heavy things and hold them ever so gently.