Because he's Edward Cullen...
The main love interest in the Twilight novels is just ridiculous. Women all over the World have been brainwashed or programmed (I haven't decided on which it is) to love this fictional character... and Why? Because he is literally the man of their dreams! In fact Stephanie Meyer herself stated that the whole Twilight idea came to her in a dream where she was having a picnic with this brooding, wonderfully handsome vampire suitor named Edward. I want you to think about that, she had a dream where she had a picnic with a sexy guy and then wrote a novel around that... They aren't particularly well written books but she's filthy rich now. She probably has more money then some European countries.
So let's take a look at Edward as portrayed in the Books and Movies...
First off he's really fucking handsome, like Bella is practically aching for his touch the moment she sees him. Like a hormone bomb ready to burst every time she initially sees him. He sparkles like a Unicorn, Smells like Summer breeze and has the body of a Supermodel. How is any normal guy supposed to compete with those kinds of looks?
On top of that he has Superpowers, He's Immortal and He's so sensitive and caring that he practically spends all his free time brooding because he loves Bella so much and all he wants to do is Protect her. He's so exceedingly polite and attentive that its suspiciously creepy like he;s hiding some terrible secret.
Edward Cullen the super strong yet caring and sensitive soul that would do anything for the love of his life and just wants to keep her safe and all to himself. What girl wouldn't go a guy like that? Practically the man of their dreams... you're own personal vampire stalker.
Sure I may be overtly cynical because I'm not the targeted audience but if any girl tells you she's read the books and hates Twilight... She's a liar. It actually does worry me that popular literature has evolved in how the most desirable male suitor has changed from Mr. Darcy from the Pride and Prejudice to Edward Cullen... Egh.
But unfortunately enough for Robert Pattinson, He plays this very guy in the movies... Honestly, his life must suck
He will NEVER get away from this role. This will haunt him for the rest of his miserable life. Sure he was born with ridiculous beauty, but Beauty is something people are either born with or they buy it. He will be type-casted for the next 10 or so years, he will play the brooding, misunderstood sensitive soul in whatever next movie role he will be offered. He will never make as much money in any other role ever, this is literally the pinnacle of his acting career. He's spent his youth and talent playing the perfect vampire boyfriend. When he's dead he'll be remembered for this one role. Women everywhere have seen him play Edward and will literally expect simular superhuman levels of devotion and love... admittedly he plays the role rather well considering the source material. He's great at just starring meaningfully at Bella with convincing angst. (I'm sure that's a talent).
But I kinda feel sorry for him, even though he's rich, famous and ridiculously handsome. Forever doomed to live in the shadow of his Edward Cullen role. With the final installing of the Twilight movies Eclipse part 2 set for release later this year it seems his nightmare will be over soon and no one is more relieved then the man himself. Some of these quotes are hilariously cynical.
"When I read it I was convinced Stephenie was convinced she was Bella and it was like it was a book that wasn't supposed to be published. It was like reading her sexual fantasy, especially when she said it was based on a dream and it was like, 'Oh I've had this dream about this really sexy guy,' and she just writes this book about it. Like some things about Edward are so specific, I was just convinced, like, 'This woman is mad. She's completely mad and she's in love with her own fictional creation.' And sometimes you would feel uncomfortable reading this thing."
- E! Interview with Robert Pattinson, 2008
"“When you read the book it’s like, ‘Edward Cullen was so beautiful I creamed myself.’ I mean, every line is liked that. He’s the most ridiculous person who’s so amazing at everything. I think a lot of actors tried to play that aspect. I just couldn’t do that. And the more I read the script, the more I hated this guy, so that’s how I played him, as a manic-depressive who hates himself. Plus, he’s a 108 year-old virgin so he’s obviously got some issues there.”
- Robert Pattinson, Empire Magazine 2008
"“Whatever. There’s nothing you can do about it. That’s the way it is. But it is weird being part of that, kind of representing something you don’t particularly like … If I do decide one day to stop acting, I just hate the idea of people going: ‘Oh, did you ever do anything else besides that ‘Twilight’ thing?’"
- Robert Pattinson, The Observer 2011
This interview alone is enough of an indicator that is he over the whole Twilight experience.
I honestly wait for the day that news comes out that he was found in a car park snorting cocaine off a Hooker's ass and him just taking his mug shot with the biggest shit eating grin. I would vouch to say that he may very well be the new Hugh Grant. Except trade out the stammer with look wistful looks of angst and desire.
Seriously, think of any other Hugh Grant movie where he doesn't played a foppish and handsome English Gentleman that stammers all his lines when confronted with his female love interest.... Name just one! You Can't. I assume the same could eventually be said about Robert Pattinson.
Poor Guy
No comments:
Post a Comment